Breathe Me
by Divine Sally Bowles
Summary: Oneshot. Set just after Nathan pulls Haley from the pool in 7x22. Nathan is at a loss on how to help Haley, and all Haley wants is to feel normal again. A reconciliation in the shower may just help them both. T for a sex scene.


**A/N - This is my third piece focusing on Naley, inspired by and taking place just after Nathan pulls Haley from the pool in the Season 7 finale. It is titled after the song "Breathe Me" by Sia. Specifically, the lyrics I had in mind were:**

_Be my friend, hold me _  
_Wrap me up, unfold me _  
_I am small and needy_  
_Warm me up and breathe me_

_Ouch, I have lost myself again_  
_Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found_  
_Yeah, I think that I might break_  
_Lost myself again and I feel unsafe_

**Enjoy and please review! (If you like this, check out my other two Naley fics, "I'm Looking Through You" and "Can't Sleep, Clowns Will Eat Me".)  


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Breathe Me

"_Breathe, Haley, just breathe! Oh my God…"_

Those words were still echoing in his head five minutes after he'd pulled his wife out from their swimming pool, along with a few other things. The sound of her choking up the water she'd been inhaling, and the terrifying realization that she'd been doing this on purpose, trying to drown. The voicemail message he'd heard with Quinn.

"_Every day, we ignore how truly broken this world is, and we tell ourselves it's all going to be okay. But it's not gonna be okay. I know that now. Once you know that, there's no going back."_

He hadn't wanted to think of how much it sounded like a suicide note, like the last words she wanted to say. He'd always been awed by how articulate Haley could be; he still remembered her valedictory speech, her wedding vows. Here, though, that way with words scared him into realizing just how much was wrong.

He got her up the stairs and into their bathroom, shivering and sopping wet. Jamie was asleep, and Quinn was sitting outside his bedroom—she'd promised to keep Jamie away from them if he woke up. Jamie was worried, too; he'd seen it after Haley had lashed out at him about the soup. Nathan didn't need him seeing this.

He got them into the shower, turning on the hot water and getting her out of her sodden clothes. The shower wasn't going to make her any drier, but it would get the chlorine out and warm her up some. She was freezing, still shivering.

When he'd gotten her out of his clothes, he started on his own. She was standing there motionless, not saying a word. She sank down to the floor of the shower, sitting under the spray and leaning her head back against the wall, closing her eyes. She huddled into herself, hugging her knees to her chest.

He sat down across from her, wishing things were different. Wishing this could be like the other times, the better times.

"_Haley, come on already! We're going to be late for our own wedding reception."_

"_Okay, just give me two more minutes! Babe, the shower massager has three speeds!"_

"_Yeah, and you have one: slow."_

It took him a minute to realize that she was crying. Maybe she was hoping he'd mistake it for water from the shower. He reached out, putting his hand on her knees.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice cracking. "Nathan, I didn't mean to… I wasn't trying to…"

"Are you sure?" he asked her, and it came out quieter than he'd meant it to.

She nodded again, putting her hand on top of his. "I just wanted to feel _something_."

It came out in a whisper. The weakness of it scared him. He took her hand in his, holding it against his chest, over his heart.

"Feel that."

He knew it wasn't what she'd meant. He knew it was too small a gesture to do anything, a band-aid over a bullet wound. But it had memories, memories of their time together. He hoped she would remember.

"_My heart's racing, too. That's what happens when I'm around you."_

She broke, finally, coming over to the other side of the shower to join him, resting her head on his shoulder, still with her hand on his heart. "I'm just… tired, Nathan. I'm tired of feeling this way."

"You don't have to, Haley." He smoothed her wet hair away from her face, cupping her cheek and stroking it with his thumb. "Let us help you. Me, Jamie, Quinn, Brooke… we're all worried. You can get past it; you just have to try. And I know you. I know you can. Do it for me, Hales. For Jamie."

Nathan leaned in, touching his forehead to hers. She looked into his eyes for a moment before she tilted her head and kissed him for the first time in the last week or so. He kissed her back gently, not pushing it. He didn't want to go too far. He was still worried about her, and he didn't know if this was what she really needed right now.

That apparently wasn't on _her_ mind, because she pushed it further, kissing him deeper and using her tongue to part his lips. When he tried to pull away to talk about it, she refused to break the kiss. Finally, he wrested free and managed to gasp out, "Are you sure?"

"I want to," Haley breathed into his neck, warm against his skin. "I want _you_."

She got up and waited for him to join her. He gently pushed her back against the wall of the shower, kissing her with the passion she'd put into it before, running his hands up her back. She balanced carefully as she wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist, trying hard not to slip. Holding her legs, he eased himself into her, feeling her moan into his lips, shuddering under his hands.

Haley's breathing was quick and rough as he kept thrusting into her, trying not to lose control. He had to keep in mind that she was still fragile—not physically, but emotionally. If this was what she wanted, what she needed to be okay, he would give her that much. But it didn't take away the fear.

She reached her climax with a lot of restraint, not calling out—they weren't alone in the house—but instead letting it rush over her physically, letting every muscle in her body curl and then relax as Nathan reached his own release. He helped her down, turning off the shower and getting towels for the two of them. As she dried off, he got her a nightgown from her dresser and a shirt and boxers for himself.

They changed into the new clothes and put the wet clothing and towels into the hamper. Lying next to her in bed, Nathan reached over and clasped her hand, stroking it with his thumb. "You're all right now?" he asked, wondering if she'd answer.

"Maybe not yet," Haley said quietly, looking at the ceiling and then at him. "But I will be."

"Before, that… were you okay with that? It's not the best time to…"

"No. No, it… it helped me feel normal again. I need to… to get back to the things I remember. Being with you is one of those things that will make me better. I'll do it. Slowly, but I'll do it. I'll go to therapy again, if you want me to…"

"It shouldn't be my decision; it should be yours. But I think it might help." He brushed her hair from her face.

"I'm sorry. For what you saw when I yelled at Jamie… I didn't mean to be like that. I know he didn't hold it against me or anything like that…" She looked towards the gold star that she'd moved to her dresser. "I just feel horrible about snapping at him. At you. You've been trying so hard…"

"I've been trying hard because you always tried so hard for me, Hales. You didn't give up on me after the accident, and when you did, it was because I'd done things that made you want to. You feeling this way is… what happens sometimes, I guess. You'll be okay." He kissed her hand. "We'll be okay."

"We'll be okay," she echoed, keeping his hand in hers, holding his gaze for a few moments before her eyes drifted shut.

Nathan lay there for a minute before he shut off the lights. He'd told Lucas once that Haley was a superhero. She had a strength that both awed and inspired him. She would make it through this. They both would.


End file.
